Excuse me! Is this Britain’s rudest ramble?

From Cockermouth to Lickey End - via Bell End, Cock Head Farm and Nanny’s Breast - hiker completes UK's rudest walk

rudest hike
(Image credit: James Forrest)

A British hiker has just completed an epically amusing ambling odyssey, walking over 500km around the UK while ticking off smutty-sounding place names.

During his risqué ramble, James Forrest - a 39-year-old author, adventurer and journalist from Cumbria - effectively hiked 11 marathons in 11 days from his home in Cockermouth to visit his brother in the Worcestershire hamlet of Lickey End. En route, he visited as many destinations with double-entendre names as he could.  

While completing the adventure, which took place between 26 October and 5 November, James raised money for Baggy Trousers UK, a charity tackling testicular cancer.

Rudest hike

(Image credit: James Forrest)

During his humorous hike he ascended hills and peaks called Great Cockup, Little Cockup and Andrew’s Knob, visited a woodland in Lancashire named Nanny’s Breast, a nature reserve in Bolton known as Nob End, and a waterway in Cheshire named Bottoms Reservoir – and, obviously, he was always going to make a quick detour to Cock Head Farm in Disley, near Stockport.

In urban areas, his pun-themed plod took James to Bell End (Rowley Regis, West Midlands), Cocking Yard (Burton-in-Kendal, Cumbria), Ten Butts Crescent (Stafford, Staffordshire) and Number 2 Passage (Manchester). James’ favourite finds included Willey Lane in Cockerham, Butt’s Fold in Cockermouth and Twatling Street in the Lickey Hills – as well as the marvellously-monikered Gloryhole sculpture in Bilston and Windybottom Farm in Marple.

Towns, villages and hamlets along James’ route included Clitheroe and Ramsbottom in Lancashire, Tittensor in Staffordshire, and the Worcestershire duo of Bell End and Lickey End.

His X-rated expedition also saw James pop into pubs including The Cock In Treacle in Macclesfield, Doffocker Inn in Bolton and Game Cock Inn in Lancashire.

Rudest Hike

James meets his brother in Lickey End

(Image credit: James Forrest)

James has previously set speed hiking records for walking between and up the highest summits in England, Scotland and Wales (which he did in 16 days, 15 hours, 39 minutes) and trekking all 214 Lake District fells known as the Wainwright’s in a time of 14 days and 11 hours. The idea for his latest cheeky challenge came to him when his brother moved to Lickey End. 

"There was a certain poetry to it, with me living in Cockermouth and my brother moving to near Lickey End – and some silly banter led to a bet that I wouldn’t do it. I hate losing so I ended up going for it, just to prove my brother wrong… 526km later and I reckon I might just have completed the UK’s rudest hike.

"It was a very, very long way to walk just for a childish joke", said James, who used the Marvellous Map of Great British Place Names to plan his double entendre-themed trek.

"But it was an epic adventure - and I'm just sad I didn't have time to visit Shitterton in Dorset or Twatt in the Orkney Islands.

James is sponsored by outdoor footwear and apparel brand inov-8, who besides making some of the best trail running shoes also make speed-orientated hiking gear, including the fast-and-light Rocfly G390 walking boots. Of his latest effort, Lee Procter from inov-8 said: “James grabbed this challenge by the balls and raised crucial awareness for something of huge importance. He might be the butt of a few jokes in the days to come, but we’re all super-proud of his achievement.”

To donate to James' fundraising efforts, visit www.justgiving.com/page/rudest-walk-uk.

Pat Kinsella
Freelance outdoor writer

Author of Caving, Canyoning, Coasteering…, a recently released book about all kinds of outdoor adventures around Britain, Pat Kinsella has been writing about outdoor pursuits and adventure sports for two decades. In pursuit of stories he’s canoed Canada’s Yukon River, climbed Mont Blanc and Kilimanjaro, skied and mountain biked across the Norwegian Alps, run ultras across the roof of Mauritius and through the hills of the Himalayas, and set short-lived speed records for trail-running Australia’s highest peaks and New Zealand’s nine Great Walks. A former editor of several Australian magazines he’s a longtime contributor to publications including Sidetracked, Outdoor, National Geographic Traveller, Trail Running, The Great Outdoors, Outdoor Fitness and Adventure Travel, and a regular writer for Lonely Planet (for whom he compiled, edited and co-wrote the Atlas of Adventure, a guide to outdoor pursuits around the globe). He’s authored guides to exploring the coastline and countryside of Devon and Dorset, and recently wrote a book about pub walks. Follow Pat's adventures on Strava and instagram.