1. Alienware M18X
Feature-stuffed, over-powered and of hernia-inducing weight, the M18X might not be the most portable thing in the world. However, it justifies its monstrous price tag and size with a world-beating 32GB of DDRAM, a 2GHz, Intel Core i7 dual-core processor and dual, 2GB GDDR5 Nvidia GeForce GTX 580M graphics cards. In a multiplayer shootout, it’s the equivalent of turning up for paintball armed with a Bushmaster.
2. Blackstar Series One 200 and Series One 4X12B
Blackstar Series One 200 and Series One 4X12B, Gibson Firebird X
Blackstar supplies Ozzy Osbourne with amplification – Ozzy, after all, is a connoisseur of the finer things in life, and Blackstar’s
cabinets are not only fookin’ massive; they’re also exquisitely tuned. Sharon! Here we’ve got oversized, 240W amps and a head
unit with four specially selected, KT88 power valves, guaranteeing maximum rock ’n’ roll and Sabbath-esque heaviosity.
The axe being toted by our model is the Firebird X. There’s no guitar with more raw tech stuffed inside it, with a completely
tweakable sonic engine and its own app store, from which you can download tailored setups, including Brian May’s patented
“widdly-weeeow” sound, that would otherwise require a van load of cables, pedals and pads. Play it loud, mother!
Price: £1,249, £599, £3,299
Link: Blackstar Amps
3. Gibson Firebird X
Blendtec Tom Dixon Extreme Blender
“Will it blend?” Tom Dixon, CEO of Blendtec, can be heard asking on YouTube, before feeding everything from an Apple iPad 2 to a Wii Remote into this extreme processor. Invariably, it transpires the answer is “Yes. Yes it will” – the Extreme’s 2,400 watts of pure, vicious blending strength and precision tuned, four-inch blade see to that. No other commercially available machine is capable of turning wood and metal into dust with quite such awe-inspiring ease – we’re talking industrial strength blendability. Oh, and it also does fruit and veg.
Link: Brokk Demolition Robot Destroying a building is a task best undertaken from very far away. That’s where Brokk’s remote-controlled demolition robots come in handy. At the compact end of the scale is the 50 (pictured), able to pass through 60cm doorways and packing a surprising punch. At the other end of the scale is the Brokk 800, a real bruiser of a robot with a reach of 10 metres, a 45kW motor and weighing in at two and a half tonnes. We’re tempted to smash up our own homes just for the reward of seeing these ‘bots in action, but for now we’re glued to the YouTube demos. Price on request Link: Brokk
Blendtec Tom dixon Extreme Blender
Brokk Demolition Robot
Destroying a building is a task best undertaken from very far away. That’s where Brokk’s remote-controlled demolition robots come in handy. At the compact end of the scale is the 50 (pictured), able to pass through 60cm doorways and packing a surprising punch. At the other end of the scale is the Brokk 800, a real bruiser of a robot with a reach of 10 metres, a 45kW motor and weighing in at two and a half tonnes. We’re tempted to smash up our own homes just for the reward of seeing these ‘bots in action, but for now we’re glued to the YouTube demos.
Price on request
5. Brokk Demolition Robot
Dan D'Agostino Momentum
This monobloc amplifier is a vision in aluminium and copper, and delivers 300 watts of sweet, pumping, sexually invigorating audio. The first product to bear the name of the co-founder of Krell Industries, it wears its grunt up front, with a power gauge inspired by a sportscar’s dash. The copper design accents aren’t just a stylish affectation, either – copper conducts heat 91 times faster than aluminium and that extra heat is what drives this tiny box to deliver such a monstrous roar.
Price: £44,000 per pair
Link: Absolute Sounds
6. Dan D'Agostino Momentum
S3 Arctic Series Laser
With a beam that travels for over four miles, this isn’t your average laser pointer. In fact, this 1W blue laser is capable of starting small fires, bursting balloons and melting plastic with its gaze. More problematically, it may cause blindness if misused – a safety lock to avoid accidents is built in and very necessary. Please note: as far as we can make out, this is illegal in the UK. Just stick to toy lightsabers, yeah?
Link: Wicked Lasers
7. S3 Arctic Series Laser
Sennheiser HD 800
These world-class cans have a frequency range of 6Hz to 51KHz. As you’re aware, the average human hearing range is between 20Hz and 20KHz, meaning the HD 800s produce sounds that you can’t even hear. As a result, your ears find the sound more natural, and odd reactions are produced if you make a dog wear them – though that will also look adorable. The huge dynamic range is achieved thanks to a uniquely oversized, doughnut-shaped diaphragm. Overall audio quality and build are both, as you’d expect at this price, rather special.
8. Sennheiser HD 800
Wilson Audio Alexandra X2
The X2s are T3’s favourite speakers, and have sufficient power to make even the most hardened metal head bow down in awe. They’re the perfect combination of terrifying, evil-space-robot looks, high-end features and attention to detail. The 15-, 13-, seven- and one-inch drivers lurking inside the 1.8m, 823kg casing blast out what we can only describe as head-caving sonic oomph. There’s finesse as well, though; their audio assault can be adjusted to suit any room, using Wilson’s “aspherical propagation delay” – ie, the top driver units can be angled to point where you like.
Link: Absolute Sounds
9. Wilson Audio Alexandra X2
What? You don’t own a crossbow? How will you defend yourself from attack by vampires, zombies and vengeance seeking elks? It’s time to get serious and purchase the Exomax. This metre-long hunting crossbow weighs just 3kg, yet boasts a 102kg draw weight – about the heft of a baby elephant – making it capable of shooting bolts at over 230mph. The Exomax comes ready-camouflaged and drilled to fi t the optional scope and quiver mounts. Now all you need to do is hoard ammo and tinned food, then wait for the impending apocalypse…
Link: Outdoor Hobbies
10. Escalibur Exomax
Ideum MT-55 Platform
The sort of table The Jetsons would have been found seated around, this is the most futuristic kitchen table currently available to humanity. The top is actually a 55-inch LED touch panel with underside cooling and a 5mm, low-iron, tempered glass covering designed to prevent finger marks. Integrated into its innards is a computer running on a super-fast, Intel hyper-threaded, 2.66GHz, dual-core i5 processor and 8GB of RAM. Also built in: HDMI ports, Bluetooth and Wi-Fi, so you can view your smartphone’s photos, download HD video and check Twitter as you eat your Cheerios.
11. Ideum MT-55 Platform
LED Lenser X21 Torch
This is to your standard torch what a Husqvarna 395XP chainsaw is to a butter knife. It’s what scientists call “bloody bright”, with seven ultra-high brightness Cree LEDs creating an output of 1,068 lumens – twice the output of your car’s headlamps. The X21 gives you the option of a broad, circular low beam or a sharply focused searchlight, and if you feed it four D alkaline batteries it’ll keep on shining for an impressive 950 hours.
12. LED Lenser X21 Torch
Nikon DS3 with 400MM F/46 VR Lens
One of the world’s most technically advanced cameras, partnered with a precision lens as large and noticeable as Gerard Depardieu taking a slash in an aeroplane aisle. The Nikon DS series offers exemplary noise control, super-rapid, 0.04-second shutter speeds and FX-format, 12- or 24-megapixel CMOS image sensors. The 400mm lens, meanwhile, is a pro-grade telephoto mega-zoomer with Nikon’s VR II stabilisation system and four extra-low dispersion glass elements to ensure crystal clarity from astounding distances.
Price: Camera £4,291, Lens £6,200
13. Nikon DS3 with 400MM F/46 VR Lens
This is a meaty movie machine that’s won numerous awards for one main reason: it’s got the highest contrast ratio of any consumer projector. While its rivals piffle about with 50,000:1, the Panasonic PT-AE4000U boasts a ratio of exactly double that. The result is breathtaking images with glowing whites and the deepest of blacks. There’s also the ability to save up to six lens settings, including 16:9 for optimal movie viewing.
14. Panasonic PT-AE4000U projector
Rocket Espresso Giotto Premium Plus
Flaunting more chrome than a 1950s American diner this espresso machine certainly looks the business. Coming from a fine lineage of coffee makers for true enthusiasts, it also serves up coffee good enough to make a caffeine addict twitch at 50 paces. Using a dual pre-infusion system, a series of pistons extract a sublimely smooth cup of coffee mechanically with an aroma to die for. Its copper boiler gives superior heat retention and boosts the steam wand’s power for exquisite milky frothiness at the touch of a button.
Link: Rocket Espresso
15. Rocket Espresso Giotto Premium Plus
Dewalt D25941K demolition hammer
Got a wall that you really can’t stand? You won’t get rid of it quicker than with DeWalt’s top-end demolition hammer, which rapidly reduces bricks and mortar to quivering fragments using a potent 1,600W motor and the big, pointy thing on the end. Wield this beast with caution, though because with its Active Vibration Control system and floating handle it’s deceptively easy to use. The vibration levels measure 8m/s2, compared to the typical 15m/s2 – impressive damping, we trust you agree…
16. Dewalt D25941K demolition hammer
B&O Beovision 4-103
A preposterous 103 inches across, this full-HD plasma is the world’s biggest consumer 3D TV. It’s not just about size, though; it’s
also about B&O’s automatic colour management system, which deals with the plasma-specific problem of image degradation by monitoring the screen every 100 hours using a built-in camera, adjusting the colour balance appropriately.
Price: £94,000 with motorised stand