HP EP9012 projector

Looks like it's been at the pies again.

Behemoth! This projector is so bloated that you could be forgiven for mistaking it for a three-chip model. Or a small mountain in the Himalayas.

The reason for this product's stature (and weight of 10kg) is soon apparent when you look around its waist. Firstly, there's a pair of grilles covering stereo speakers, then there's the built-in DVD player, and of course the base has to be massive to counter the weight of all that electrickery - which is probably why HP filled it with a small subwoofer.

So basically, it's a whole home cinema in one box - just add power, a DVD and a nice white surface to blast your picture onto. But is it worth giving up floor space to this fatty?

As a projector, it's pretty good. The brightness is better than the specs suggest, while contrast and detail are okay rather than spectacular. Rainbow effects are quite visible, but aren't as distracting as on some other DLP models. Our main caveat is with the fan noise, which is just too loud and distracting - especially given that you need to sit near enough to hear the sound system.

Feeding a decent external signal through the High-Definition-ready, HDCP DVI input doesn't really improve the picture. That just goes to show how capable the DVD player is.

The sonics are impressive compared to the tinny audio from most built-in speakers, and this will be the real draw for anyone without the room to set up proper surround sound.

This is an interesting proposition for anyone who wants to bust out a standalone cinema on special occasions, but the size, weight and fan noise will be too big an obstacle for many.